Remembering to Read
Helpful cues support you reading + some books with dads in them
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Sometimes…or oftentimes, the challenge to any habit is remembering to do it. We can have all the best intentions to remember to read, exercise, meditate, and drink more water, but our human brains can only retain so much. This can be even more of a challenge, depending on your current circumstances or your particular brain wiring. Being overly stressed with a lot on your plate makes it hard to remember things. A baby waking up multiple times a night, forget about it (literally, you forget so many things). An ADHD brain like mine is processing 10 ideas at once, I often forget THE thing I wanted to do. So here are some cues to help you remember to read. I am sharing some low-stakes, easy-to-implement cues as we call them. Yes, there are about a billion apps and fancy tools available for any developing any habit, but these are fairly simple.
1. Visual reminders
Your phone wallpaper
Take a picture of your book and post it as your phone wallpaper. You will see it every time you pick up your phone. Human brains need novelty. We tend to get used to something like a note that says, “read your book” after we have seen it enough. By using the book you are currently reading, it will be more specific and novel (no pun intended).
Your book
The presence of your book in your environment is a cue in itself. This is not dissimilar to having the floss next to your toothbrush. If you had to go into another room from the bathroom every time you were going to floss at night, it would be much harder to take care of those teeth.
Having it near by as much as possible.
2. Time-based reminders
The good old alarm
Is there a specific time you want to read? Set a reminder on your phone. There are many mixed feelings about our phones these days, but this is an example of using your phone as a tool to support goals that are meaningful to you. You can also set an alarm on another home appliance or an analog alarm clock if preferred, but of course, make sure you are going to be in the presence of said alarm at the set time.
Reading platform tools
Some platforms have a reminder function; for instance, Audible can remind you to listen to a particular audiobook at a specific time.
3. Behavioral reminders
Temptation bundling
Pairing your reading with other behaviors is a helpful practice. This can be a form of temptation bundling that was mentioned in the How to Read in Parenthood Guide. It’s simply pairing something enjoyable with a task that may not be as in-the-moment gratifying, but it is still important to you to accomplish. For example, when you exercise, listening to your audiobook.
Accountability partner
Pair up with an accountability buddy. It’s more fun to have someone cheering you on. If you are hoping to read more, pair up with a friend to text you or call you (at a frequency that works for you) to help you stay accountable to your plan. Maybe you read the same thing, or maybe you just support eachother in the act of reading.
A few books I read this last year about dads, what about you?
This weekend is Father’s Day in the US. Here are a few books I read this last year that feature dads1. If you have any good dad books, share them in the comments.
The comments section is what we make of it. Feel free to answer any or all of the questions below.
Any cues that help you remember to read?
What are your favorite dad stories?
When or what are you going to be reading this week?
Any reading conundrums? These may become a topic for a future post.
*I am an affiliate of bookshop.org, if you purchase through this link I will earn a small commission (at no extra cost to you)
As always—Just a little reminder: The content on A Wonderful Mess posted by Dr. Kathryn Barbash, PsyD, is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for medical, clinical, legal, or professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Reliance on any information provided is solely at your own risk. Always seek the advice of your licensed mental health professional or other qualified health provider.
Here are links to all the books* pictured: Beartown by Fredrik Backman, Small Things Like These by Claire Keegan, How to Sleep at Night by Elizabeth Harris, and Wild Dark Shore by Charlotte McConaghy
I read The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls. It is about a dad. Not sure he would be considered an exemplary dad! The story is engrossing, though.
Your tip for making sure to bring my book downstairs in the morning is working for me and I’ve had much more luck reading during “quiet rest time” instead of getting sucked into my phone. I’m currently reading Emily Henry’s new book!