Ok, wow. Thanks for writing this. I consider my child neurodivergent and I write about it a ton. Some may not consider having a mental thought disorder as being neurodivergent and that’s ok. It’s my role as a writer to break through the barriers of stigma. Hopefully I do that. This is a great framework.
Thank you Shelley. I think this can be used as a framework for anyone encountering unexpected paths in parenthood--mental health, chronic illness and so on. And breaking down the barriers of stigma is a passion we share.
I viscerally cringed when I read the "But he makes eye contact!"--I definitely know a few people who would make comments like that. Thank you for this--this is so important and EVERYONE should read it.
Yes I just had a wonderful interview with @juliemgreen and one of the themes that emerged was how much perceptions have changed since our teens were first diagnosed. She used the word 'pioneer' - and it tracks.
I wish they had more resources and support for parents when I was growing up. My parents had info on my epilepsy (which they withheld from telling me…I found out the same way I found out Santa wasn’t real. By finding stuff hidden somewhere!!). As a teen, I was diagnosed with ADHD but there weren’t really any IEPs in the 90s. Only “special education,” and being “sentenced” there meant an end to my road to any kind of four year university. I was lucky to get into a good school and while I managed to go beyond expectations (master’s degree…and now with an interest to go back for a second), I just wish more help was available back then. If I were a teen today, I would have been diagnosed a long time ago and my parents equipped with the right help for me. My dad, now in his 70s can barely grasp the terminology that comes with ASD (which is a possible issue for me as well. I certainly show traits of it. Just never got it officially diagnosed) such as verbal vs non-verbal.
Yes, it is hard to imagine to what life may have been if I had known I had ADHD as a younger person. Sadly, though there are still so many misconcpetions and barriers to help. Many more are helped today but we still have room for improvement.
I was good friends with a girl who was, as an adult, diagnosed with ASD and she had a similar experience. I don’t think her family knew what exactly was “wrong” with her, only that she had a hard time with school. She managed to finish high school but took six years to complete her bachelor’s degree because she didn’t get into a four year school. She also had trouble holding a job at first. We’ve kind of lost touch and I get the sense that she got tired of trying to fit in so her “symptoms” seem more apparent. I’m not sure if she has any close friends anymore. We haven’t seen each other in years since we live so far away and it’s actually hard to spend time with her too.
Ok, wow. Thanks for writing this. I consider my child neurodivergent and I write about it a ton. Some may not consider having a mental thought disorder as being neurodivergent and that’s ok. It’s my role as a writer to break through the barriers of stigma. Hopefully I do that. This is a great framework.
Thank you Shelley. I think this can be used as a framework for anyone encountering unexpected paths in parenthood--mental health, chronic illness and so on. And breaking down the barriers of stigma is a passion we share.
A lovely article, thank you!
Thank you, Kate.
I viscerally cringed when I read the "But he makes eye contact!"--I definitely know a few people who would make comments like that. Thank you for this--this is so important and EVERYONE should read it.
Thank you so much Sri. People have good intentions but they can still have a negative impact.
My husband did shout this at me when I suggested we get our son diagnosed.
We received similar statements--but it also reflects our confusion over what autism can "look like"
Yes I just had a wonderful interview with @juliemgreen and one of the themes that emerged was how much perceptions have changed since our teens were first diagnosed. She used the word 'pioneer' - and it tracks.
I wish they had more resources and support for parents when I was growing up. My parents had info on my epilepsy (which they withheld from telling me…I found out the same way I found out Santa wasn’t real. By finding stuff hidden somewhere!!). As a teen, I was diagnosed with ADHD but there weren’t really any IEPs in the 90s. Only “special education,” and being “sentenced” there meant an end to my road to any kind of four year university. I was lucky to get into a good school and while I managed to go beyond expectations (master’s degree…and now with an interest to go back for a second), I just wish more help was available back then. If I were a teen today, I would have been diagnosed a long time ago and my parents equipped with the right help for me. My dad, now in his 70s can barely grasp the terminology that comes with ASD (which is a possible issue for me as well. I certainly show traits of it. Just never got it officially diagnosed) such as verbal vs non-verbal.
Yes, it is hard to imagine to what life may have been if I had known I had ADHD as a younger person. Sadly, though there are still so many misconcpetions and barriers to help. Many more are helped today but we still have room for improvement.
I was good friends with a girl who was, as an adult, diagnosed with ASD and she had a similar experience. I don’t think her family knew what exactly was “wrong” with her, only that she had a hard time with school. She managed to finish high school but took six years to complete her bachelor’s degree because she didn’t get into a four year school. She also had trouble holding a job at first. We’ve kind of lost touch and I get the sense that she got tired of trying to fit in so her “symptoms” seem more apparent. I’m not sure if she has any close friends anymore. We haven’t seen each other in years since we live so far away and it’s actually hard to spend time with her too.