24 Comments

It’s interesting how much the work of parenting is calming ourselves down. Thanks for this!

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Yes, it's tricky that way. A lot less doing than we think, more being. Doesn't make it any less hard though!

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Jul 3Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

I completely agree! Parenting truly is a journey of self-discovery and growth.

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Jun 25Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

This is so true!

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Jun 24Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

I read a book years ago that mentioned that one can be late and upset or one can just be late. Oh? That was pretty interesting. Was it really true that I could opt out of berating myself/others for being late? A lot of the time, it was possible--oh, well, and move on to addressing what I could.

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Isn't it an amazing thing to realize??

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Jun 24Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

I stepped away from my irritable (for an unknown-to-me reason) son to regroup before I made the situation worse and opened this post. Perfect timing - thank you for this reminder, this is a daily practice for me!!

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Such great timing. I found myself needing it last week after I had finished writing this, it was so helpful to remember!

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No wonder parents shop on line more these days! Who can blame them?

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Yes it's so true! We definitely take advantage when we can.

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Jul 3Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

Absolutely, online shopping offers convenience and saves time!

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This!

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Jun 27Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

But literally this: "The louder demands start. You reflect those feelings and await the calmness to appear (just like the parenting book describes). The calmness does not appear, instead, there is a new type of energy showing up."

I also resent the Target Ladies that tell you how they've been there with this all-knowing superiority. Why don't you share the magic words to end this all?!

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Yes! What is the secret??? Please share.

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Jun 26Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

A good reminder for me. I'm in the middle of one of those phases where everything seems to provoke a meltdown, and I just want to get everyone dressed/fed/nappy changed etc so that we can leave the house. My own attitude and reactions are what I need to work on as I'm definitely responding with less and less patience, which does nothing to improve matters!

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Those are lots of good facts to notice i.e. I notice I am losing patience, i notice I am feeling a rush to get out the door. It sounds like you are definitely aware and that is so helpful. Getting anywhere when there are so many needs and human emotions should be an event in the Olympics.

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Oh this is so great and humorous. I love the last line: “Target is a stressful place to be.”😂

The part about offering compassion to yourself in the moment is so key and really helps me step out of the spiral.

Something that has been an ongoing journey of radical acceptance for me is coming to terms with a genetic medical diagnosis for my son that has resulted in two surgeries and a lifetime’s worth of doctor’s appointments plus the uncertainty of not knowing when or if more serious complications will ever arise.

How you outlined the steps of radical acceptance was really helpful. Thank you!

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Oh Ashley, I am so glad you enjoyed it. It's a lot to go through when you have a child with health needs and managing uncertainty, compassion and radical acceptance are wonderful tools to have at your disposal.

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Jun 25Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

I love your break down of radical acceptance in the actual moment of panic. It’s easy to preach and hard to do but thank you for showing us what that actually looks like in reality. LOVE THIS NEWSLETTER!

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Thank you, I love radical accpetance but it does feel like a vague idea. It can be applied in many flexible ways if we break it down.

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Jun 25Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

This reminded me of one of my favorite Rumi quotes: “Learn the alchemy true human beings know. The moment you accept the troubles you’ve been given the door will open.”

And a fave from my grandmother: “if you cannot change your situation, change your attitude towards it.”

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There are the wise philosophers and thinkers of the past and then there are the wise grandmothers :)

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Jun 24Liked by Kathryn Barbash, PsyD

I love this SO MUCH. Thank you. 🙏🏻

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So glad it is helpful!

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